Chapter 1
One day the world ended. It was something of a surprise for the creator. Well, not so much a surprise as an unexpected event. It hadn’t been scheduled for at least 2000 or so more years, and even then it was still under warranty.
******
“I just wanted to have a good morning”, thought Blake. He really hadn’t expected to see a dinosaur walk into his coffee shop. The thing was his mornings always started off with a dinosaur, or a vampire, or one time a chubacabra. His job had odd (and sometimes even) hours, his pay was that he was allowed to stay alive, and should he fail at his job, the world would end (kind of).
The dinosaur looked (if a dinosaur could look) like she was as surprised as he was to be there. She sniffed the air, looked at the menu items, and then attempted to eat one of the wait staff. That was when Blake sprang into action.
He stood up, walked over to the dinosaur, whispered something under his breath, and with a flash of light and the sound of air rushing into a vacuum (kind of like, “Fhoomp!” but with less oomph) she vanished. He went back to his coffee. “Let’s see”, he thought, “what could possibly happen today that requires me to not finish drinking my coffee?” He opened his newspaper and saw his assignment for the day.
Royal Family to Visit Boston!
BOSTON, MA – The royal family will be visiting the Commonwealth of Massachusetts to look at colleges and universities for the prince and princess to attend starting in 2 years. At this time, the royals are not divulging the details of the visit or which schools will be visited, it has been suggested that Harvard, MIT, and Brown will be the possible schools visited. Buckingham Palace refuses to comment and all of the schools suggested have refused to comment as well.
“Wonderful, I love Cambridge at this time of the morning.” Blake sighed, looked up and walked over to the quasi-traumatized waitress. “I’ll need this to go, and get me a plain bagel, not toasted with butter.”
“Giant, Dino…. Dino….” muttered the dazed waitress, “I don’t know…”
“Look,” said Blake, “It couldn’t have been a dinosaur, right? I mean they don’t exist; it was most likely just a guy playing a joke. It’s April 1st after all and MIT has that game…thing.” He sighed, this was always his weak point, and he could never convincingly lie. He pulled out his flashlight, played with the knob on the front, and then smacked her on the head with it.
“Ow! What the hell was that for?!?” cried the waitress.
“I don’t know, I don’t have time for this and I want my coffee.”
******
The creator was flummoxed. He even got the upgrade and all the downloadable content. Forget about calling customer support, their useless as Hell…
*****
The royal family began their stay in Boston on a bad note, “Well, how was I supposed to know we weren’t supposed to call them “Yanks” anymore?” grumped his highness Prince Renoe. He kicked what he hoped was a stick. His sister made a face at him, “You didn’t call them ‘Yanks’, you called them ‘Yankees’, which if we are going to be living here, probably wouldn’t be a good idea.”
The royal visit had been a royal pain in the ass for their entire security detachment. In the first 6 hours of their visit, they had walked into a sports bar, called the Red Sox, “The best Yankee basketball team ever”, called the state of Massachusetts “The commoners”, and then asked for their tea back. This resulted in 3 concussions, 2 arrests, and one paparazzi photographer being taken to the hospital to have his camera removed, so all in all not that bad.
They had been standing outside Harvard Yard for 20 minutes hoping that someone would take their picture, forgetting the fact that the local news reporters had not been allowed to know the details of the visit. Not that they would have been allowed 100 yards near the detail, since ‘Yankee-gate’ had begun.
As Princess Lilah tried to start up another conversation with a “commoner”, Agent Torents thought to himself, “I can’t wait for this day to end.”
********
billsfiction 